Is your son or daughter struggling with homework?

As a parent, helping with homework isn’t about spending hours hunched over a desk with your child!  Parents can be supportive by demonstrating study skills and role modelling organisation skills, explaining a tricky problem if needed, or just encouraging kids to take a break every now and then!

Here's some important things to remember when it comes to homework ...

Get to know your child’s teachers, and what they're looking for by keeping an open line of communication with the school and the teachers.  HCC’s recommended homework and study times are as follows:

Year	Mon-Friday	Weekends
7	1 hour	1 – 1 ½ hours
8	1 – 1 ½ hours	2 hours
9	1 ½ hours	2 ½ hours
10	Minimum 2 – 2 ½ hours, five times per week
11/12	Minimum 3 hours, five times per week

Ensure your child has a homework-friendly area in your home – make sure it is well-lit and ventilated and fully supplied with paper, pencils, etc.

Work out a regular study time – remembering that some kids work best in the afternoon, following a snack and play and others may prefer to wait until after dinner.

Trying helping them make a plan – if it’s a really heavy homework night or if there’s a difficult assignment to tackle, encourage them to break up the work into manageable chunks.  Don’t forget to build in some regular breaks (10/15 minutes each hour)

Minimise any distractions such as TV, loud music, or phone calls.

Don’t do the homework for them!  They won't learn if they don't think for themselves and make their own mistakes. Parents can make suggestions and help with directions, but don’t do it for them.

Motivate and monitor – Offer some words of encouragement, check their completed homework, and be available for questions and concerns if they have any.

Set a good example. Think about what your kids are seeing you do … do they see you reading a book, planning your weekly budget or making time for a healthy breakfast?  Remember that your child is more likely to follow your example rather than your advice.

Praise their work and efforts – often! Stick a great test score or their latest artwork on the fridge.  Mention their achievements to relatives and friends.

If there are continuing problems with homework, get help.  Talk to their teacher to eliminate broader issues which may be impacting on their learning, consider a tutor

Some Interesting and Upcoming Courses for Parents

Are you looking to enhance your parenting skills, strengthen your relationship with your child and gain more confidence in your parenting in general?  You are not alone!  Being effective as a parent is not automatic and is always demanding and challenging.  There's no 'instructions', but there ARE courses and workshops and there is a wealth of information out there for anyone interested.  

Why not consider a parenting workshop, run by experienced and trained professionals?  You'll be able to share your own ideas and experiences with other parents, build your confidence and develop some important skills  

Relationships Australia offer a range of workshops throughout the year, call them direct to book and check out their website for more information at http://www.relationships.org.au.

“Mums Raising Boys” – up to the age of 12 years

Cost:  $25 pp

Time:  6:30pm – 9:00pm

Venues: 

Fremantle:  Thursday 1^st May 2014 

West Leederville:  Tuesday 29^th April & Wednesday 23^rd July 2014

Joondalup:  Wednesday 14^th May 2014

"Kids and Today’s Technology"

Cost:  $35pp/$50 per couple

Time:  6:30pm – 9:00pm

Venues:

West Leederville:  Monday 9^th and 16^th June 2014

Fremantle:  Thursday 3^rd and 10^th April 2014

"Parent-Child Connection"

Cost:  $50pp / $75 per couple

Time:  6:30 pm – 9:00pm

Venue:  West Leederville:  Mondays 9^th, 16^th, 23^rd, 30^th June 2014

Parenting WA also run courses and there's a 2-session course coming up called "Engaging Adolescents”.  To be held on Tuesday 17^th and 24^th June, from 9:15am – 12 noon at the Altone Public Library, Beechboro.  It's free!

Is your child new to school this year and still struggling with some separation distress?

Separation distress or anxiety is quite common - changes of environment, people, routines and the number of other children they are interacting with can all cause spikes in the hormone cortisol, which creates the stress symptoms that you may see – crying, clinging, tummy aches, refusal to leave your side, poor appetite, restless sleep and even outbursts and tantrums.  This means the ‘downstairs brain’ is registering threat – and is acting accordingly. They key stressor for children is separation from the most significant grownup who is their protector. 

Here's 10 tips to help (compliments of Parenting Expert Maggie Dent, from www.maggiedent.com)

As a starting point, it is useful to explain to kids that new things, places and people often make even adults feel those same feelings of being a little unsettled or anxious.

Young children usually have strong imaginations and there are some small techniques that strengthen the connection to Mum or Dad while they are away can help lots: 

1.     You could help them create an imaginary protector – They imagine having their huge protector with them while they are away from you! I have two free downloads that could help here  http://www.maggiedent.com/content/free-downloads

2.     Fill an empty, clean, small container with a lid with kisses from everyone they are fond of, and tuck it in the bottom of their back pack.

3.     As they leave home always place a kiss from mummy in the same hand, left and daddy in the right … it is also magic and stays there all day.

4.     Practise sending them rainbows of love from your heart to theirs at recess and lunch and ask them to send one to you when they miss you.

5.     Put a really small stuffed toy – maybe smelling of your perfume, Dad’s after shave or with a lipstick kiss – in bottom of backpack. Again they don’t feel so separate and alone.

6.     Draw funny pictures on their lunch bags.

7.     Take a small bite out of their sandwich.

8.     Teach them how to take 3 big breaths and breathe out the butterflies hiding in their tummy or gently rub their tummy telling the butterflies they are safe.

9.     Teach them how to calm themselves by singing 'Round and Round the Garden' in their hand while making circles in their hand, just as you would do – music and touch trigger feel-good hormones.

10.   Help build a special connection to one teacher or teacher assistant who can nurture their transition.

These tips can be modified to help children going on school camps too!

FIFO and Parenting Adolescents

Raising Teenagers in today's world is no easy business, and the added complication of Fly-In/Fly Out Lifestyles can make it harder.     ECU are doing research in this area, and have a website with tips for FIFO Families.

http://www.chprc.ecu.edu.au/projects/raising-adolescents-developing-strategies-for-fly-infly-out-parents/overviewhttp://www.chprc.ecu.edu.au/projects/raising-adolescents-developing-strategies-for-fly-infly-out-parents/overview

One Mother's Phone Contract with her Teen

To My 13-Year-Old, An iPhone Contract From Your Mum, With Love

Posted: 12/28/2012 5:15 pm

Dear Gregory

Merry Christmas! You are now the proud owner of an iPhone. Hot Damn! You are a good and responsible 13-year-old boy and you deserve this gift. But with the acceptance of this present comes rules and regulations. Please read through the following contract. I hope that you understand it is my job to raise you into a well rounded, healthy young man that can function in the world and coexist with technology, not be ruled by it. Failure to comply with the following list will result in termination of your iPhone ownership.

I love you madly and look forward to sharing several million text messages with you in the days to come.

1. It is my phone. I bought it. I pay for it. I am loaning it to you. Aren't I the greatest?

2. I will always know the password.

3. If it rings, answer it. It is a phone. Say hello, use your manners. Do not ever ignore a phone call if the screen reads "Mum" or "Dad." Not ever.

4. Hand the phone to one of your parents promptly at 7:30 p.m. every school night and every weekend night at 9:00 p.m. It will be shut off for the night and turned on again at 7:30 a.m. If you would not make a call to someone's land line, wherein their parents may answer first, then do not call or text. Listen to those instincts and respect other families like we would like to be respected.

5. It does not go to school with you. Have a conversation with the people you text in person. It's a life skill. *Half days, field trips and after school activities will require special consideration.

6. If it falls into the toilet, smashes on the ground, or vanishes into thin air, you are responsible for the replacement costs or repairs. Mow a lawn, babysit, stash some birthday money. It will happen, you should be prepared.

7. Do not use this technology to lie, fool, or deceive another human being. Do not involve yourself in conversations that are hurtful to others. Be a good friend first or stay the hell out of the crossfire.

8. Do not text, email, or say anything through this device you would not say in person.

9. Do not text, email, or say anything to someone that you would not say out loud with their parents in the room. Censor yourself.

10. No porn. Search the web for information you would openly share with me. If you have a question about anything, ask a person -- preferably me or your father.

11. Turn it off, silence it, put it away in public. Especially in a restaurant, at the movies, or while speaking with another human being. You are not a rude person; do not allow the iPhone to change that.

12. Do not send or receive pictures of your private parts or anyone else's private parts. Don't laugh. Someday you will be tempted to do this despite your high intelligence. It is risky and could ruin your teenage/college/adult life. It is always a bad idea. Cyberspace is vast and more powerful than you. And it is hard to make anything of this magnitude disappear -- including a bad reputation.

13. Don't take a zillion pictures and videos. There is no need to document everything. Live your experiences. They will be stored in your memory for eternity.

14. Leave your phone home sometimes and feel safe and secure in that decision. It is not alive or an extension of you. Learn to live without it. Be bigger and more powerful than FOMO (fear of missing out).

15. Download music that is new or classic or different than the millions of your peers that listen to the same exact stuff. Your generation has access to music like never before in history. Take advantage of that gift. Expand your horizons.

16. Play a game with words or puzzles or brain teasers every now and then.

17. Keep your eyes up. See the world happening around you. Stare out a window. Listen to the birds. Take a walk. Talk to a stranger. Wonder without googling.

18. You will mess up. I will take away your phone. We will sit down and talk about it. We will start over again. You and I, we are always learning. I am on your team. We are in this together.

It is my hope that you can agree to these terms. Most of the lessons listed here do not just apply to the iPhone, but to life. You are growing up in a fast and ever changing world. It is exciting and enticing. Keep it simple every chance you get. Trust your powerful mind and giant heart above any machine. I love you. I hope you enjoy your awesome new iPhone.

xoxoxo,

Mum

PARENTING IDEAS TO PREVENT ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION IN TEENS

BeyondBlue:    Parents and Guardians Webpage:    Parenting Strategies.

Anxiety and Depression in teenagers is on the increase.    The National Depression Prevention organisation Beyond Blue now has a webpage for parents/guardians, to suggest ways of preventing these developing, and what to do if they already have.

A

SAFE SCHOOLS HUB: info for parents

http://www.safeschoolshub.edu.au/for-parents

Check out the National Safe Schools Framework's SAFE SCHOOLS HUB:  main focus is primary students, but messages are sound for all ages.